Pineapples and Love Letters ( Hijack, iCarly AU )

In five, four, three, two-!



....



Hiccup slid into a seat at the bar in the kitchen. His older brother, Noah, was on the talking to someone, and he sounded aggravated. Knowing he'd want to stick around for the conversation, the teen grabbed a bowl of pineapple from the fridge and resumed his front-row spot.

" No..no...Stephanie! I don't want to go out with you again! No it's not...no...Stephanie...BECAUSE I DON'T LIKE YOU!" Noah shouted into the phone, hanging up.

" Wasn't that your date from last night?"

" Yeah."

" How'd it go?"

" Terrible."

" Why?" Hiccup inquired, biting a chunk of pineapple.

" Well here's one reason- she brought her pet UNICORN to dinner."

" There's no such thing as unicorns." Hiccup giggled.

" Yeah? Try telling that to her."


The phone buzzed again. Noah picked it up and immediatly groaned.


" Stephanie! No..no i don't want to talk to your pet unicorn!" Noah made a 'help me' face at Hiccup, who stifled another laugh.



Arms wrapped around Hiccup's waist.

" Hey, Sunshine." Jack said, smiling when Hiccup tilted his head back to look at him.


Just as the apartment's front door was closing behind behind Jack, Astrid pushed it back open. She took a glance at the arms around her best friend and strode up to the owner of them, tapping his back.

" Let's imitate our camera-boy, shall we? Five, four, three, two-"

Jack made a frightened face and released Hiccup, quickly sitting down.

" How's my Hiccup?" Astrid said softly, hugging him before sticking her tongue out at Jack.

" Don't you people have HOMES to go to?" Noah mumbled, questioning how sturdy the chain on the door really was. Astrid grabbed a couple pieces of her friend's pineapple and pulled herself onto the counter to sit.


Jack leaned towards Hiccup, pulling out two handfuls of small, colored notes with hearts on them.

" These are love notes."

" There's no need to make so many we already know you're obsessed with him." Astrid said dryly, popping a piece of fruit in her mouth and chewing it slowly.

Hiccup looked over at Jack, ignoring Astrid, " Uh-oh. From Shannon?"

" Yeah! And try taking a test while she's staring at you like this!"

Jack clasped his hands together ridiculously, smiling suggestively, and altogether looking very creepy.

" Please never make these faces again." Hiccup said.

" What's it gonna take to make Shannon understand? I don't wanna go out with her!"

" Just talk to her. That always works." Astrid teased.

" Sassy blondes aren't allowed on the counter." Hiccup told her, smiling.


Noah tapped the teen's head, " Hey, you wanna see my video for Whynotdateme.com?"

" I thought you hated dating websites?"

" Well, i don't want to be alone, with only my little brother to snuggle forever."


He ruffled Hiccup's auburn hair. The teen turned to Jack.

" Jack, will you type Noah's name in there for us?"

" Maybe for a kiss." Jack teased. Hiccup pouted briefly, but obliged with a kiss on his friend's cheek.



A few moments later, and they were watching Noah on Whynotdateme.com, though he was aruguably making a fool of himself.

"~ If you're looking for a fun, creative guy, well, you just took a right turn down Lucky Street~ Why don't you go ahead and put it in park? Send me an e-mail. Write it, click it, send it..~"

He tossed a baseball awkwardly, and there was the sound of breaking glass before the video ended.


Hiccup looked at Noah, giggling,

"'You just took a right turn down Lucky Street'? That doesn't make a girl want to e-mail you! That makes a girl want to go-"

The teen imitated throwing up.


He looked back up at his brother, eyes narrowing, " Now, what did you break with the baseball?"

Noah looked like he wanted to run, " Nothing..."

" Did you kill our goldfish?"

" Yes..." He gathered up his things to run some errands, and spoke up again as he walked out the door, " I think he wanted to die!"

" That fish had hopes and dreams!" Hiccup called after his brother.


" I'm gonna go heat up some chili." Astrid said, hopping off the counter and walking to the refridgerator. Hiccup blushed when he realized Jack was looking over at him.

" What do you say, cutie? Another kiss?~"

Hiccup pointed to the pile of love notes still sitting on the bar, " I expect to be recieving at least half that amount of love letters before you get another kiss out of me."


Jack smiled at him. He grabbed a pack of post-it notes and a pen, drawing out a heart on the first piece before sticking it to Hiccup's forehead. The teen smiled.

" One down~"



....



And we're clear!